Wedded Bliss
I was at a wedding today. It was a joyful and fun filled day long affair. There were tuns of people there and lots of activity for the unbelievable number of children in attendance. In fact they set up a long, paper covered table down the center of the room for all the kids to eat at and colour on. It was a fantastic idea that I think all the parents also greatly appreciated. My husband had to work in the morning and met us there as soon as he was able so since we had driven separately I brought the kids back home a bit after bed time and my husband stuck around for a while longer to enjoy the festivities.
On my drive home as the kids snoozed in their car seats I was thinking about how impressed I was with the comfortableness of my shoes. I mean, I had been wearing strappy heals for almost 10 hours and it wasn't difficult to walk around. Once I took them off at home they swelled but but on my drive it still got me thinking about how I would typically be feeling after a dressed up event such as this. That's when I realized how comfortable I'm beginning to become with myself.
You see, typically after an event such as this the dress that I would have chosen would have been the lesser of many evils. I would have tried on many, many styles and fits and would have settled for the one that made me feel the least awkward. I would have spent the evening adjusting, positioning and worrying. I would have been almost desperate for someone to compliment me just so I could know that I didn't look terrible. Whenever someone would look at me though I was convinced they would be thinking "She actually left the house thinking she looked good?"
Tonight was very different from that. In fact, though I did get several compliments on the fascinator I made as well as my dress it wasn't a necessity for my fragile ego. I didn't really care (well, quite as much) if people liked it or not. I knew I liked it and that was what mattered.
One of the factors in this change is the reduction. Now, with my smaller chest I am able to fit into clothing that is more flattering. Instead of picking something based on a limited selection of items that would be passably appropriate I am now able to reject clothing strictly because I just didn't like it. That was a luxury I couldn't always indulge before.
Another factor in my change is a growth of confidence in myself as a whole. I definitely still have a long way to go, in fact this last week I had a bit of a slump in my esteem climb I can now recognize that everyone has days like that. It's only natural and nothing to beat myself up over like I would have in the past. When I look back at my journey as well I know I've progressed a lot over the last year and this slump isn't so bad at all. It's encouraging to see that the little steps I've taken over time really have brought me to a better place.
On my drive home as the kids snoozed in their car seats I was thinking about how impressed I was with the comfortableness of my shoes. I mean, I had been wearing strappy heals for almost 10 hours and it wasn't difficult to walk around. Once I took them off at home they swelled but but on my drive it still got me thinking about how I would typically be feeling after a dressed up event such as this. That's when I realized how comfortable I'm beginning to become with myself.
You see, typically after an event such as this the dress that I would have chosen would have been the lesser of many evils. I would have tried on many, many styles and fits and would have settled for the one that made me feel the least awkward. I would have spent the evening adjusting, positioning and worrying. I would have been almost desperate for someone to compliment me just so I could know that I didn't look terrible. Whenever someone would look at me though I was convinced they would be thinking "She actually left the house thinking she looked good?"
Tonight was very different from that. In fact, though I did get several compliments on the fascinator I made as well as my dress it wasn't a necessity for my fragile ego. I didn't really care (well, quite as much) if people liked it or not. I knew I liked it and that was what mattered.
One of the factors in this change is the reduction. Now, with my smaller chest I am able to fit into clothing that is more flattering. Instead of picking something based on a limited selection of items that would be passably appropriate I am now able to reject clothing strictly because I just didn't like it. That was a luxury I couldn't always indulge before.
Another factor in my change is a growth of confidence in myself as a whole. I definitely still have a long way to go, in fact this last week I had a bit of a slump in my esteem climb I can now recognize that everyone has days like that. It's only natural and nothing to beat myself up over like I would have in the past. When I look back at my journey as well I know I've progressed a lot over the last year and this slump isn't so bad at all. It's encouraging to see that the little steps I've taken over time really have brought me to a better place.
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